Free to good home

My animals will probably soon be looking to give me away sometime in the future. They'd like you to know that I'm house-trained, quiet and I don't shed, but I do having some food guarding issues. Two Domestic Shorthair cats, one Quarter Horse mare and one geriatric Valley Bulldog will probably pay someone to get rid of me! Why? Because, as I've said before, we're learning physical exams this semester.

As the pet of a vet student, you receive the best of care. Top of the line foods (since we get it discounted), fantastic medical care (since we have specialists and state-of-the-art equipment at our beck and credit card's call) and more playmates and toys than you can imagine.

In exchange, we practice on you. Yeah, sucks to be you.

Before I go palpating and auscultating and sticking things up the arse of animals I don't know, naturally, I'm going to start with the ones I do know. Physical exams are actually quite daunting to me. There's so much to remember and it's the basis for the rest of your diagnostics. I've always been in awe of my veterinary mentors and just how much information they can get using their four senses (taste should probably never be a part of the physical exam) and a stethoscope. The aforementioned bulldog is a horrible little psycho (affectionately known as a "caution dog" by her veterinarian) but she's stupidly tolerant of anything I try to do to her. The mare is the same way. She's actually given me some bad horse handling habits because she's just so chilled out that I forget that not all horses are the same way. Plus, it gives me a chance to spend as much time as I want to try to find a horse's heart sounds without being laughed it.

Except possibly by my riding coach.

Scratch that, definitely by my riding coach.

Don't you laugh either! It's harder than it seems. They have big hearts, but there's just so much horse between you and the heart that hearing it isn't always easy. And they're completely uncooperative about it, since the best place to hear the heart sounds is more or less directly where their leg is, and do you think they'll remove it for me? So inconsiderate!